New Life Adventures in the City

We moved to the CITY!!!!!  About, 2 weeks ago (right after my last blog entry) we went into the city to look for a new place to live.  We were just not feeling a lot of peace where we were at, and felt like we were not accomplishing as much as we wanted to be.  So we were praying about it and felt like the Lord was saying to go to the city!  We spent a day looking through the newspaper and calling around.  Now the tricky thing, is find a place that will rent from like 6 weeks...so we were praying hard!  And because the Lord is SO faithful, the first place we went to look at...we fell in love!!!  The place was perfect, it was like the size of the main gather area of our other house, but it was perfect!  We told them yes, and the following day we backed up all of our belongings into the car (and let me tell you between Shelbye and I, we were PACKED to the rim!  But we squeezed ourselves our little impala and we were off.

As we arrived in the city we again came to find out how blessed we were!  One of the things we were most nervous about was carrying all of stuff up the stairs...well the entire family came out to help us!  We live in part of the house upstairs, and next to us in the landlords sister and mom, and down below us is our landlords brother and family.  Seriously, could not ask for more kind, protective, giving people!  They are always looking out for us, and are always seeing ways that they can serve us!

So we moved all our stuff in (took like 3 days to actually get settled) but started getting to work, making charts of different of people to talk to, cost of everything that we could possibly think of, and by the end we made ourselves a HUGE binder!  The entire week we kind of had the same schedule.  We woke up and went somewhere at like 11am...then we left at like 10pm and finished up some stuff at home until about midnight, and did the same thing again the next day.  **Important to know...Belize LOVES Adele...ANYWHERE and EVERYWHERE we would go...she goes with us!!!!! Celine Dion pops up every know and then, but Adele definitely dominates!

So that was last week, and this week, we have stated meeting people in person, and seeing how God is putting people together to be part of the Count Me In Camp!  We just meant with a young couple today, who got SO excited and was saying that this is something that God was answering their prayers with!  God is doing a big work here, and we are so blessed to be a part of it.

Now also during the past couple weeks, the Lord has been teaching my heart a lot.  Since I put in my resignation at one of my prior jobs, I have not worked in a position that allowed me to use my gift of "administration."  God knew that what I thought was a gift a few years ago, actually was being used in not the most healthy way.  I very easily would take responsibility for things, and take it upon myself to INSURE what I thought was supposed to happen....happened.  Now keeping in mind I was saved and this was all coming from a good heart, I just did not realize so wounds in my life, so it got distorted, and it just started becoming now how God wanted me to live out of my gifts He gave me.  So God ended up taking this "part" of me and, like a good Father, was looking out for me!  Because God is more concerned with our hearts, over our gifts that we can use for Him...I had about 3 years of realizing that I was more important to Gods heart that what it was that I could do for Him. All this to say, God just again gave me the opportunity to use my administration gift again, after about 3 years of not using it at all!!!  The difference is now, is that I am able to see the difference between doing in by my own strength, and relying on His strength.  Last week, as we were finishing up our week, and we had done everything in the "natural" to put together information that we could.  We typed up like 20 pages of information!  And then started to feel discouraged because we did not know what to do next...we had done everything, at that point, that we knew to do, and did not know how to move forward from there.  And this is where God just said...."Tati, just sit in my presence, let me work in my perfect timing."

Working with Pastor Mark on CMI

So we did, we just rested in His presence, and praised the Lord, and thanked the Lord for everything He is doing and is going to do....then God just started presenting new opportunities, opening new doors, and it was so exciting!  It is so much more allowing God to be the leader, waiting and communing  with the Lord and asking Him what to do and what He IS doing every step of the way.

So now, we sit in one of our favorite hang outs, and enjoying the journey that the Lord has us on.  It is about saying YES to right now...it does not matter if I do not understand "NOW," it is about saying yes to what we see and what we do not see.  If you could be praying though, the thing I am having hard time saying YES to is.....this DOG that barks for like HOURS outside our window when we are trying to go to sleep!!!!! I went to the window yesterday and yelled!  Then I prayed over the dog, and Shelbye debated putting some Benadryl in a piece of meat and throwing it out the window:)  Thank you for your prayers:)

Tomorrow, we are going downtown to help host an event for the homeless people in Belize City.  We are going to feed/clothe the homeless and have music artists playing in the park!  SO excited!!!  So that is from 2-6 pm if anyone is in the area:) haha

Then on Sunday we are going to church and Central Assembly again!  Then we are driving to Belmopan to go to the Agricultural Fair...HOPING to see the rodeo!  

Also I totally forgot that I did not have pics before to show you of the last time to the caye where we slept on a dock!!!

CHURCH LAST WEEK

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=3810714910060

As you are looking for ways to be praying....since we moved to the city, there has been about 16 murders.  We live on one of the safer parts of the city, but just continued prayer for all that has been happening and for what the country has been experiencing as they have been dealing with all of this.  Also please pray for continued direction as we are here, there has been a lot of new development, and just praying about what God wants me to do after I get back to the states.  I am also praying that God will open up an opportunity for me to have a job when I get back to the states in June.  If anyone knows anything!  I am willing to relocate for a summer job! And the last thing to keep me in your prayers about, is I felt like God was opening doors to go to Kenya for the month of August and praying for funds ($4000) to come in for that.  We will be working with orphans, the homeless, putting on a youth camp like the one we are doing in Belize!

Support Me (tax-deductible)

https://interns.sagefundraisingonline.com/tatib

Thank you so much for everything that yall have been doing to encourage me in so many ways while I have been here!  I love you all lots!

In The Street

The Past couple days have been pretty eventful!  And just a lot of reflection:

 

I feel like i am being able to live out of a completely different healthy. Like I would SO much rather have difficult convos and be confronted about stuff and grow. Like the whole thing about being very intimate with few people is like a different world. Like we can love and be in relationship with many, but when you have a few people around you who are really focusing on: TRUST, COMMITMENT, BEING ALL IN, AND INTIMACY, there is a whole new world that opens up!!!  But it is just so much like letting all the ugly come out is so much better!!!! And accountability!!!!
 

And so much realizing that like "I" am nothing...i can do nothing, and striving is all just in complete vain. I feel like there have been so many lessons that the Lord is teaching, just a season of knowing something...but bringing it to a completely new level of truly understanding. Like "trust the Lord" ok yeah I have to trust the Lord, that makes sense...BUT NO!!!!! Like REALLY trust the Lord, what does it look like to REALLY TRUST the Lord....the Lord is bringing us all to a whole new level!!!!

It has been a little different now that Lauren has left....it is a little sad, because we were so different we were having our stuff come up all the time which was great.  It really was difficult a lot of the times, but it was so worth it, and then the revelation that would come that we would be able to talk about was like...life changing....but it was because we were fully committed to each other, we were truly ALL IN!!!! We lived out of a place of intimacy and we trusted each other.  We talked about EVERYTHING, like even why we were thinking the way we were thinking.  We would not let each other, leave conversation and we would talk through everything until we could exhaust it no longer.  Just seeing how this was truly life changing makes it be something that I understand is so worth fighting for.  I just love it so much...now again, like there were a lot of fights in there (as i am sure yall can understand) but wow, like we got to work through our junk and then pray for each other through our junk.  It was being so quick to understand that I am nothing without the Lord and being in a place where I can be very quick to be humble....through humility the Lord will work in unthinkable ways.

SO yes, i really miss Lauren and being challenged the way I was before.  But we have different seasons, and through our different season, come different lessons.  Like how God has brought Shelbye and I to be together.  We are very different, and come from very different places, and places of thinking...but that is so good!  

Something that the Lord has been teaching me here is just how when I am living without so much luxury, and living closer to the people who i want to minister to and love on, how it is so much easier, there is not as much gap... Like the other day we went out to spend time with the homeless. Well we dressed in our most non flashy outfit, took out all my jewelry, and brought nothing with me at all to go and sit with people. So we started walking by people and just asking if we could sit down and spend time with them. It was so so great, they did not think i was better than them at all, and one of the goals was for them to not think "I THOUGHT" i was better than them at all...because of course I am not.  Which is one of the most important things. I just loved it so much. Now lets just take a couple minutes to say that i did not understand 75% of what I heard from people over the course of the day (for reasons of not understanding their creole, or because they had a difficult time speaking...for different reasons) but it did not matter. My favorite part was when there was this woman and she asked me for money, I said I had nothing, and then we just talked for a little bit and she said we could pray with her and i just stood there holding this women for like 5 minutes telling her she was loved and it was gonna be ok.  It just reminded me of what we are supposed to be doing!  This women probably had not bathed in like a week, she was missing many of her teeth, but she just wanted someone to hold her, rub her back and tell her she was important!  It is such a different feeling when i literally don't have anything to give but my love, and that is the thing that people need the most, love. I think back to being at home and how it was so hard for me to get to the place of being able to go out and "minister" or walk outside my home and love on people....and goodness it is so much easier when we are positioned differently. Sorry that was A LOT of info, i hope it made sense what i was saying. I feel like i have so many thoughts going through my head right now, i am just kind of all over the place:)

But yeah those are the big things on my heart, deeper intimacy in relationship and understanding more about being like Jesus:) haha
 

So we also have been working on setting up for Count Me In Camp.  We are working on getting artists right now, we actually were sitting downtown Tuesday and saw a pastor that we know walk by....after talking for a few minutes we were telling him we were trying to get artists for the camp and he told us about this guy who is really famous and knows a lot of different artists...so we started walking there and as we got closer, i realized that...what I knew who he was telling us to go visit.  I just never knew he was like "a big deal" haha that is so funny, and so on the 28th he invited us to help out with a homeless event where they clothe and feed the homeless and have like 15 different artists who play music throughout the day. SO excited!!! So we will get to see who we want to ask to play for the camp. I think you would have so much fun!!!!

Ok so that is a big summary of my life and what the Lord is teaching me:)

So I totally forgot my camera to upload pictures today but I will try to add more in next time I am able to get to the internet! Love you!

Easter Weekend

So did you know that everything closes in Belize for Easter Weekend?  So all Friday, Saturday and Sunday....until the night...then the country awakes again:)  

So since the team left and the conference ended, Shelbye and I have been on a few adventures!  Lauren left the week after which was extremely sad.  The week before she left though, the Lord was teaching us a lot about our place in the family.  Ironically, Shelbye was the youngest in her family at home, and was the youngest of the three of us.  Lauren, the middle in her family at home, as well as here...and oldest at home for me as well as here with the girls.  The Lord was really showing us a lot about the roles we felt like we were supposed to have growing up, compared to the roles God desired for us to have.  For example, it is really east for me as the oldest, to take on responsibilities that were not mine and feel like I have to be in charge....which through our little family the Lord was showing me how that affected the other people in the family, like Shelbye.  It was crazy, kind of hard to explain, but really healing!  

After we had to say goodbye to Lauren, Shelbye and I took a few days to rest and relax.  So I know these people that have a boat company, so we got to go out to the caye for free and then slept on a dock.  We lived on the end of this dock for 3 days.  At night it got kind of cold though so we had to sleep in the bottom of a boat with our pepper spray! haha It was so much fun though, we would wake up on the dock, we would shower on the dock, we would relax, and read and spend time with the Lord on the dock, and then we again would go to sleep on this dock!  We were so thankful because we also had hammocks....and it was free!

Then Easter came and we went out on a camp out with some people from church here.  The Mennonites that our church knows has some property that is on a river so many people from the church camped out there.  I sadly, kind of got sick and was in bed with a fever, so camping only lasted one day:(

On Easter Sunday, we went to the sunrise service in the capital in Belmopan.  There were like 16 pastors that came and spoke to everyone and it was such a great time of unity for everyone! 

Today we are getting ready to have some people over to our house tonight, which we are really excited about!!!  And then tomorrow we are planning to go to Belize City and spending time with the homeless people.  

This next season, is going to look very different, and Shelbye and I are really praying and asking the Lord to show us hat it looks like.  We are staring to work on more of the orphanage plans as well as Count Me In Camp for this December.  As you continue to pray for us, please be praying that during this season that we can focused on hearing the Lord's voice.  We desire to have doves eyes and desire for more intimacy in friendship with each other.

I have been missing home, so I just want to tell everyone that I miss you lots!!!!